15 of 100 ... Exhausted

Wow ... what a day of utter exhaustion! I get so turned around on days like this, so much to do, so little energy.  I'm not sure where this is coming from - nutrition & weight (which is my go-to ailment!) or something else that is internally off the rails. 

For all the exhaustion, man, was my brain going a million miles an hour!  No one topic did it flit through my head with superficiality and lightness of being ... no, let's pick a topic and chew on it a hundred times and then chew on it some more.  Things like suicide, like purpose, like where do I go from here ... *sigh ... sometimes I wish there was a switch I could flick and turn everything off.  Maybe it would help with the night's sleep as well!  (So friends don't become concerned: no, the suicide does not have to do with contemplating it as a choice for myself.  Yes, I have genuinely contemplated that in my past, and no, taking that action is something I would never do.  No matter how bad things get, I'm too curious to see what will happen tomorrow for that not to happen!  There's more than that, but my point is that, no matter how far down that path I might go, I'll never go the distance.)

Day's Report:

Habits:
- Clean Sink: yes
- Cups of Water:4
- Hours of sleep: 5h 50m
- Meds: yes
- Reading: no
 
Goal Advancement for today:
R:  Had a 3 hr conversation with my brother last night after writing my report.  So much for the early-to-bed gratitude!
(E-Environment, P:Physical, F:Financial, PA: Prof/Personal Development, R: Relationships.)
Gratitude:
1. Today, I'm grateful that my blood INR is back in the safe zone.  I was also told from 2 different sources that blood clots are rather frequent, that every 3rd or 4th person that comes in for blood tests is having their INR checked.  That's a lot of people! 
2.  Today, I'm grateful for the relationship that I have with my brother.  I don't think there's anyone in my world that is to me what he is. 
3.  Today, I'm grateful for getting things done at work by the time they were needed.  It was like something was against me and all sorts of things were intervening to hold me back, but I managed to make it and complete what I needed to by the time I needed to complete it by.
4.  Today, I'm grateful for a short week.  Friday is a DDO!  So I only need to get through 3 more days to this week!
5.  Today, I'm grateful for the chance to try to get to sleep before 10 again.  At least I have the opportunity!