Liz stood at the edge of the swimming pool. Whatever made her think she could do this?
She looked at the swirling water and the thoughts that came rushing back to her. The boat. Her brother. A day of fishing and it ended so bad.
The afternoon was warm, not hot but nice enough to grab their fishing poles and rush down to the lake. They had done this a million times - on the weekend, after school. And this was like all those other times. First, they scrambled in the dirt near the water where it was loose and good for bugs. Once each of them had 2 bugs, preferably one an earthworm, they ran down and jumped into the old rowboat that was kept at the side. If she was the last one, Tom, her brother would help her out so they always went to the boat equal.
And then the race was one - who would be the first one to get a fish? Tom had got two of the last three and she had been so excited when she snagged the four inch little fish the last time. Tom was almost as excited as she was!
As they worked at snagging the first fish, they talked, about everything they could think of: mom's sadness; why dad didn't come home; what they wanted to do this summer; if one got some money, what would they buy; what did they want to do when they grew up.
"Tommy?" Liz hesitantly asked.
"Yeah?" he answered.
"My friend Frida asked me about you today. Why would she do that?" Liz wondered.
"What did she ask?" her brother responded.
"She wanted to know if you had a ... a ..."
"A what?"
"A girlfriend. Tommy, what's a girlfriend?"
"What did you say?" Tom ignored her question.
"I said that I didn't know."
"That was a good answer."
"You didn't answer my question," Liz let out an exasperated huff and stood up to face her brother.
At that instant, her fishing pole pulled and as her attention was elsewhere, she wasn't expecting it. It pulled her off balance and, in an instant, she went overboard. Liz barely had time to scream before she went under and gulped in water as the pole pulled her down.
She honestly didn't know what happened - the next thing she knew, she was resting in the bottom of the boat, lightly drifting on the lake. Alone. She opened her eyes and saw the bright light coming towards her.
"Elizabeth! Thomas!" the voice came across the still water.
"Here! Over here!" she tried to call out but it came out like a croak. Liz felt around her and found a stick. Even if she could hit the side of the boat a couple of times, she was sure they would hear her.
It worked. It wasn't long before the people in the rescue boat made their way towards the sound. It Noah and Matthew, two of their neighbors, and they helped her into their boat, wrapping her in a warm blanket and giving her a container of water.
"Where is Thomas?" Matthew asked.
"I don't know. Isn't he with you?" Liz breathed out
"You're not well, dear; stay quiet and we'll be back home soon," Noah hushed her.
What followed was a nightmare and Liz couldn't help but blame herself. She felt like it happened yesterday: she knew what she was wearing, she knew what Tommy was wearing. She could still see the look in his eyes before all went dark. Yesterday, wasn't it? In fact, it was much longer than that. Much longer.
She had stayed away from water ever since. She never went fishing again, she never went to the beach, she never went in a hot tub, she never went to the pool with her friends. If her children wanted to go, she would either send them with someone else or come up with something else for them to do. She just couldn't bear the memories ... until now.
The moment had come. She could not go back. She needed to face it and go for it. She didn't know how to swim the last time she went into the water, she really didn't know much more this time. But she did as she was told - take a deep breath, hold it, reach out her arms and jump.
And jump.
She felt the warmish water swoosh over her and her head stayed above.
And in that instant, the small crowd that were around her broke out into whooping and cheering.
She stood up and turned around, the water came up to her chest and gently splashed into her face. And looked at all who were there for her. Her 4 children, her 6 grandchildren and her one great grand child, born a month ago.
As simple as it was, she had faced her fear, all those memories, and won.
"Thank you, Tommy," she whispered.
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